Friday, August 07, 2009
fucking angry.cried a lot today :bad dream last night ; woke up crying .forced a smile the whole day . then emo-ed. cried at home .just cried again .fuck you .endless tears shed , but you don't fucking give a damn .really very angry with you .and you don't care .all you wanted was to start over .and how was i supposed to start over ?how long were you going to keep that matter from me ?
i'm crying but no one knows or even fucking care for that matter .no mood , but everyone's expecting me to be happy ;fake a smile and just carry on like nothing happen .i may be able to do that for a while .but not forever .and on a night that i don't feel like going out the most ,i'm forced to go out ,and fake the biggest smile ever .i'm tired of all these lies and secrets .secrets i keep lies i tell ;secrets everyone keeps , lies told to keep me from getting hurt .don't force me to my limit ;because i'm already very near it .and when i reach my limit ,i'll just end it all with a single jump .i'm sorry xuemei for the "blank" space again .
really no mood , don't feel like talking about it .
sorry .
sorry to zishing and leslie too ,
moodswinged today and spoilt the whole outing ):
really sorry !
thank you stella and sufang ,
for being there for me .
sorry qinyuan for not listening to you .
ok, i needed to get that out .
goodnight people .
